Ranting Time: When characters fight back!
by Megaphone.Kills.You
Summary: Some Naruto-characters are sick and tired of being bashed! Clishés and simply mean haters destroyed their reputation and now they're fighting to gain it back! T for language Chapter 5: Sasuke does not like to be called an emo. Really, he's not amused.
1. My name's Karin and I'm not a slut!

**This is basically a rant of some Naruto-characters concerning bashing. These are just my opinions, so feel free to voice your own one, if you disagree or see some things different. And if you know any characters that are getting bashed a lot or just have clichés that aren't even true, tell me and they are going to appear in this! The characters so far are: Karin, Sakura, Orochimaru and Ino.**

**I hope you enjoy this and who knows? Maybe you are bashing some characters in your fanfictions wrongfully? Then I hope that you see that those characters aren't that bad^^ Because this is mainly the purpose of this 'story'!**

**(And please, ignore my bad english. English is not my native language...)**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, nor its characters. They belong to Masashi Kishimoto.**

* * *

A girl with dark blond hair steps onto the stage and grabs the microphone.

"Hello, dear readers! I'm **Megaphone. Kills. ****You** and welcome to the Bashing-rant! We have some special guests here today! Please welcome our first guest with me, Karin!" she announces, as a girl with dark pink hair, thick-rimmed glasses and red eyes goes up to the blonde. Karin is wearing her usual cloths and gives Megaphone. Kills. You a computer chip. The blond girl disappears in a puff of smoke. Her voice booms through the room so that the audience has to shield their ears "So, Karin has something to say to you, dear readers, so listen! Karin, you can start now!"

Said redhead clears her throat and wipes some bangs out of her face. "I'm here today to tell you people just how _pissed_ I am." Venom drips from her every word. "In most fanfictions I am always the stupid, dense, fangirl-ish slut!"

Some people in the back of the audience start to laugh at her, but shut up after she glares at them.  
"I mean, what's wrong with you? Okay, I understand the fangirl part, but you guys make it even seem worse! In your fanfictions, I would jump Sasuke-kun as soon as I see him in front of everyone!"

A teen with sharingan eyes shudders at the image.

Snickering fills the air and Karin roars in annoyance. "If you haven't noticed, I would never, EVER, do that in public! Come on, I still have some dignity!

I admit it, I wanted to assault him in his sleep, but I haven't and I haven't even really tried yet, now have I? I understand that you need some rabid fangirl for your stories, but why can't you just use an OC whose only _**purpose**_ is to try to get into Sasuke-kun's pants!"

Again, the sharingan user shudders.

"But what angers me the most is that I'm always reduced on that! In 'Naruto', I'm quite analytical and intelligent, but in your stories it's a miracle when I can count to three! I can do other things than fawning over Sasuke Uchiha! Really, I'm not as stupid as you portray me to be! There's a reason why Orochimaru trusted me with a whole lair to watch all by myself!

Next, the slut-part. This is the part that I really don't understand. I don't drool at every man I see or try to seduce him!"

Suddenly, a screen is next to the fuming redhead. It shows a girl, looking just like Karin, with the difference that this mirror image wears different cloths. "This" the original grinds her teeth in anger "is how you see me. This simulation wears a school uniform, since there are many high school based fanfictions."

The girl on the screen wears a blouse that has a few buttons undone, showing off her belly button and a lot of cleavage. The skirt is very, very short, barely covering anything and the shoes have quite high heels. The girl's face is mutilated with too much make-up.

"Dear people, look at me..." She pointed at herself "...and then at the screen. Now, do you see the difference? Not to mention that I wouldn't be even allowed wearing something like that in a school"

The audience first glances at the girl, then the simulation. A few whisper to their neighbor while the others nod in understanding. A murmur goes through the crowd and Karin smirks triumphantly. "My cloths aren't that slutty. First, the shirt. It has a high collar, the zipper is done _all the way_, and it has long sleeves. The only 'slutty thing is that is shows off my belly button! And, by the way, when you look at this picture..."

The image on the screen changed into the picture of a boy and a girl wearing similar things to Karin. The shirts were the same, while they wear longer pants.

"Our uniforms are quite the same. The only change I made were the short shorts and the high stockings. So don't tell me I'm wearing slutty cloths, those are just the common cloths every jailer wears as a uniform."

By now, the tracker-nin has calmed down a bit, yet she still looks very pissed and glares at nothing in peculiar. "I hope you now understand that, and even if you don't, you at least now know MY opinion. And I know that there are at least a few people out there who think the same way. Not all of you are mean, heartless people! Good night, fellas!"

The kunoichi bows and goes off the stage, behind the red curtain. The people listening clap, but stop when there is a loud 'BOOM'. They cough because there is smoke everywhere. When it clears, they spot the blonde from earlier again. She grins at them before she says into the microphone "Wow, that was quite a rant! Thank you for coming here tonight, Karin!"

"Now, we still have three more people to go for today's show! Our next special guest has come over here from Konohagakure, the hidden leaf village! She has similar problems as Karin and she wants to vent out her frustration!" shouted Megaphone. Kills. You.

"Here is Sakura Haruno!"

* * *

**Okay, this was the first chapter and the first character! When I first started reading fanfictions, my opinion of Karin was completly based of the stories I read. By now, my view of her has changed and she's one of my favorite characters. The same goes (more or less) for Orochimaru.**

**Anyways! I would like to hear your opinions and to hear your ideas!**

**(And the thing with the uniforms is most likely true. You can find the proof in Naruto Volume 38, at the end when team Hebi encounter the beaten guard.)**


	2. We're Saku and Ino and we're not stupid!

**Welcome to the second chapter of Ranting-Time! This time Sakura and Ino are trying to change your view of them! I didn't want to repeat the whole 'Fan girl'-issue too often, that's why I put them both into this chapter. **

**The next is Orochimaru, by the way :)**

**You can always suggest other characters that you think are bashed wrongly (or clischés that don't fit at all)**

**Edit: I edited this chapter slightly after Kaelin The Black Swan pointed out that I made the mistake of making Sakura too violent in this myself ^^; I did my best (which is not much) and tried to make it better and I hope that you like that version better! **

* * *

"Hello, nice to meet you!" called a kunoichi that suddenly stood behind the blonde. Sakura is wearing something that looked a lot like the dresses she used to wear as a Genin, but she had removed the headband from her pink hair.

"Hi, Sakura! I'm glad you could make it! If it doesn't bother you, you can start right now with your rant, just promise not to break anything, okay?" greeted the show's host. The pink-haired medic hands the other girl a computer chip, just like Karin. She disappears again and Sakura walks up to the microphone.

"Again, my name is Sakura Haruno, and you already know why I am here today! I took this opportunity to tell you that I am quite displeased of the way people often portray me."

She takes a deep breath, closes her eyes and shouts "What the hell?" The people in front of the stage winced at the volume, while others fall out of their chairs.

"Like my dear fellow Karin, the thing many people like to see in me, is the crazy fangirl!"

Again, some girls and boys in the audience stare guilty at the floor.

"When I made my first appearance in the story, I was a fangirl. I know that, and it's embarrassing. But as time passed, I changed. I did, but some of you just don't notice that, do they? My crush turned into something more serious, and I started to care about strength and about other people too! For example, during the Chunin exams, did I giggle like a fangirl when I got the chance to 'hug' Sasuke? I just bragged when I was talking to Ino and that was to annoy her!"

As the audience remembers the scene, few shake their heads. To emphasize it, the scene is played on the screen.

"I didn't! Again, really, my crush had turned into real love! And still you see a mindless, stupid girl when you look at me, someone who would run into a wall, laugh, and run right into it again, when Sasuke's face is painted to it!"

A certain Uchiha in the back of the room now has a disgusted look on his face and his left eye starts twitching.

"Again, during the Chunin exams, I was the only one who could solve the test all by myself, without cheating! The ones you guys copied were actually Chunins, so that the ones, who cheated, would cheat **right**!"

The kunoichi sighs heavily. You can see how much she has to control herself to restrain herself.

"Well, first impressions really seem to be important." She sighs, but her face falls back into a scowl immediately.

"But there are always the ones who hate me because I killed Sasori. You hate me because I killed one of your favorite characters? That's one of the most ridiculous things I've ever heard! So I did kill him? How does that makes me bad? Or stupid? Or a bitch? Have you EVER thought about that? Or that he wanted to kill me too? Apparently not. Just because I killed him doesn't result in me being stupid/a bitch/etc.!"

"Yes it does!" screech some girls. Sakura grits her teeth, yet continues as if she hadn't heard anything.

"Next point on the list is my personality in general. And yes, I do hit Naruto a lot, because he simply deserves it sometimes. So you say I am a bipolar bitch who is better off dead, because I apparently have a short temper and get easily angered!

And here you say I am the stupid one. There are a lot of people out there with short tempers and maybe you're even one of them! You don't even see that I have a nice and caring side too!

Then, you say I am weak and good-for-nothing. At least some of you do. First proof that I am not: remember? I killed Sasori, the reason why you hate me. Then, I can kick through a tree without even using much strength! I doubt Sasuke can do that. When Kankuro was poisoned, who was the only one who could heal him and create antidotes? It was me!

You only see what you want to see in me. I don't care what your reasons to hate me are, as long as they make sense! Karin already said it, since we both have the same problem and are reduced to bimbos. That's not fair!"

"And this was Sakura Haruno, Konoha's cherry blossom! Thank you again for coming here today! Now, would you please go behind the curtain? You can chat with Karin for a while!"

This time the smoke alarm goes off. "Hey, you guys with the tech-stuff, make the stupid thing shut up, will ya?" demands Megaphone. Kills. You., before she turns to face Sakura.

The pink-haired girl gives her a smile and waves the audience good bye.

Just as the Haruno disappears from sight, a boy climbs onto the stage, whispers something to the blonde, hands an envelope over and runs back behind the curtain. The receiver of the message enfolds the paper inside of it, reads it and announces "I am sorry to tell you that our next guest, Miss Ino Yamanaka, decided not to show up and instead sent this letter that I will now read out loud!"

Some boys "Aww"ed in disappointment while others seemed relieved.

_Dear Megaphone. Kills. You._

_I have been watching this show for a while now, from my home and I decided to write a letter instead of showing up myself __J_

_You know, I don't wanna repeat what four-eyes and forehead said. So I'm just adding some stuff in this letter here, so make sure to read it out loud to the audience, 'kay?_

_Perfect. Now, like stated above, I'm in the same dilemma as my dear female fellows. But compared to them (especially Sakura) I'm not thaaaaat smart. Okay, so I may not be a freaking genius, so what? Naruto's even dumber (though he has his moments) and still you aren't all like "Uh, Naruto is such an idiot, I hate him because he's got the IQ of a doughnut..." and stuff like this. So why me?_

_This is, like, ridiculous! Is it because I like boys a lot and care a lot about my appearance? That doesn't always have to mean I'm some kind of slut. Hell, I'm a teenage girl!_

_So, yeah. With that said, I can say 'Bye'_

_Ino Yamanaka_

_P.S.: make sure to glare at them to emphasize my point, will you? Thanks! ;D_

"Dude, I wonder how the letter got here so fast...Anyways, now it's time for our new guest!"

The audience and Megaphone. Kills. You. wait for the mysterious next guest to appear, yet only the crickets from the show in the neighbor room could be heard and everybody turned their heads in confusion, looking for the stranger.

Suddenly a car could be heard, along with a police siren. To the audience's horror, the blond girl on the stage jumps up in joy and exclaimed happily "Oh, that's him, that's him! Hm, I wonder why they got him this time..."

A police officer opens the door on steps into the room, dragging someone behind him. "Who is Megaphone. Kills. You?" he asks. The girl waves at him, a grin on her face. The officer turns to the unknown man, whose face cannot be seen. "Okay, you can go now, but if you try anything, I WILL BE THERE. Understand?" he sneers. The policeman goes outside again, slams the door and drives away.

Now everyone can see, just who arrived in company of the police.

"How are things in Oto, Orochimaru? Long time not seen!"

* * *

**Let's face it, sometimes our view on characters is too much based on first impressions or how they act with characters we like. For example, those who read Death Note: many of you hate Light because he killed L. You say that it was unnecessary. But I think that it actually helped the plot and made things even more interesting. I like both L and Light, and I was sad that L was killed, but still, he had no chance to survive. **


	3. I'm Orochi and I do not molest children!

**So, please welcome with me the third chapter of "Ranting-Time"!**

**This one is the one about Orochimaru! I'm pretty sure that there are a lot more things about him to say, but this chapter contains the topic, that is probably the most discussed one. **

**And also, before you start reading, I wanted to ask you again if you could tell me which character you know, excluding the ones that were already featured, are getting bashed. I don't know that many, so it's really important for this story, if you want more chapters!**

* * *

Orochimaru sighs and answers "Well, if everything was going the way I wanted it to, everything would be fine."

"So something's wrong. Care to tell the audience what exactly is wrong?" requires Megaphone. Kills. You., holding her microphone in his face like a reporter. He contemplates for a while, then says "Since it is related to the reason why I am here tonight, I will." The blonde squeals quietly.

The man bites his lips, slightly nervous and ashamed. The great Orochimaru, one of the Sannin, is ashamed!

"It's my...subordinates." he confesses with another sigh.

Half of the audience starts snickering, but shut up abruptly as a snake that looks quite dangerous appears in front of the stage.

"THAT'S NOT FUNNY!" shouts an angry Orochimaru and the volume is increased by the microphone.

"ARGH! MY EARS!" is heard from the people, which makes tonight's guest smirk in satisfaction.

The girl next to him steps a little away from him and asks carefully "So what is it exactly what they do?"

"They all run off!" yells a frustrated Orochimaru, this time with a safe distance between him and the microphone. "And why? Do you know?" interrogates the blonde further.

"That brings me to my current problem and why I am here instead of Oto. So would you leave the stage now?"

"Of course!" Megaphone. Kills. You. exclaims, hands (the the audience's horror) him the microphone and disappears, once again, in a cloud of smoke.

After he recovers from his coughing fit, he clears his throat and starts with his rant.

"The number of my subordinate has been decreasing rapidly lately because of one, simple reason.

They believe in rumors.

Now they all think I'm **gay** and a **pedophile**!"

"Did I hear pedophile?" questions the police officer who suddenly perks his head through the door frame. He's glaring at Orochimaru.

Said man clenched his fists and growls "Yes, you did. But I didn't do anything! ANYTHING AT ALL!"

The police man blinks a few times, confused by this outburst, then says "Okay, if that's so...", closes the door and goes back to his car.

The room stays silent for a while. Then a loud hiss is heard and everyone turns back to the seething criminal on the stage. He points at the door.

"This is a perfect example! You know what? That was the sixth time today that I wasn't arrested for all the murders I committed or being a Nuke-Nin that wants to destroy Konoha, but for something I didn't even do! I DO NOT MOLEST CHILDREN!

I don't care if you call me crazy, evil, a murderer or a freak! Because I'm most definitely a murderer, maybe even evil, crazy and a freak! You have proof for that!

But is there any proof that I ever had the urge to rape/ravish Sasuke-kun?"

"WAIT, WHAT? RAPE/RAVISH ME? WHY DID NO ONE EVER TELL ME ABOUT THAT?" screeches a raven-black haired teen in the back of the audience, while another Uchiha yells "DON'T YOU DARE AS TO LIE AS MUCH AS A FINGER ON MY LITTLE BROTHER!".

Orochimaru face-palms.

"Oh **great**! Now you scared Sasuke-kun with your false assumptions and your nasty ideas! Do you know how hard it is to find a good body?"

At this, the brave people in the audience start to giggle at all the oh-so perverted implications whenever Orochimaru says the word 'body', while the remaining members of Team Hebi gather around their still disturbed and probably traumatized leader.

The man who is laughed at just stares clueless at his audience, before realization hits him and he snarls "Oh, now I get it! Now I know why you call me 'The Michael Jackson of Anime'! It's because I want Sasuke-kun's body! ... No wait, scratch that, that sounded wrong. With you perverted people who can't get their stupid minds out of the gutter, I can't say things like that."

Still, laughter echoes through the room and Orochimaru is now really pissed off. He bites into his thumb, pulls up the sleeve of his shirt, revealing the tattoo on his arm and holds his bleeding finger threatingly just above it. "You don't want me to summon Manda, do you? So you better shut up now. Don't forget that I'm an S-ranked criminal. And you really don't want to anger me further, trust me."

For the umpteenth time this night, everyone is forced to stop laughing or talking.

"Now, that you're all listing to me again..." the Oto-nin hisses in a sickly, false-sweet voice "...I can finally continue.

So, you should all know what my goals are and what is required for that. And you also know the side-effects of my jutsu.

That's exactly what I need Sasuke-kun for. Uchihas have the Sharingan, they're strong and they're good looking, means, they're ideal **_vessels_**. Vessels, people. Vessels. That is everything I need Sasuke-kun for, nothing else. That was why I was so bent on winning Sasuke-kun for my village."

"Oh really? We don't believe you! And why did you put Sasuke in this gay outfit?" some random person shouts.

With a frustrated sigh, Orochimaru runs his fingers through his long hair and brushes a few strands out of his eyes. "You don't get it, do you? I am Orochimaru. I am immortal. I am above you pitiful mortals who will get older and eventually die. I would never let myself stoop as down as to lust after someone. I have more important things to do! Like practicing jutsus or finding a new _vessel_!

And as for the outfit; don't ask me, he chose it himself. I never forced him to wear it or something."

Some people nod, understanding and actually accepting this fact.

But some still seem to be unconvinced. A girl somewhere in the front, on the left side, pipes up.

"And why do you have all those good-looking guys still with you, if you can't use them as vessels? Huh? How do you explain that?"

A smirk finds it way on the snake-summoner's face. "That's an easy one. I hate talent going to waste. People have talent, so that they use it. And I just happen to need skilled and talented shinobi. Especially now, now that you scared almost all of mine off. They can go on mission for me and retrieve scrolls and stuff like that! I trust them, so I keep them."

"Oh, okay...and what about Kabuto? You're so totally gay for each other! And he watched you in the shower!" the girl asks.

"I gave him a home. I gave him a purpose in life. While the same goes for Kimimaro and the Sound Four, I gave him something more. I gave him an identity. That's why he's so loyal to me and I like that. He would never, ever betray me and he is very intelligent. He follows my orders precisely and never disappointed me before. So it's only understandable that we act the way we do.

Ah, the thing with the shower...Megaphone. Kills. You., would you please...?"

"Aye, aye, sir!" booms through the room and the screen displays a picture of "The Shower-Scene".

While some people look kind of disgusted, a few blush, and the KabutoxOrochimaru-fans squeal.

Ignoring the audience's reactions, Orochimaru explains "As you can see, there is a shower curtain. A one you can't see through, but only see a silhouette. It's not like Kabuto ripped it away and watched me shower. That would've been quite...disturbing.

Well, and...that was it. I don't have anything more to say to that topic.

I don't care whether you like me or not. As long as you stop creating those awful rumors about me and stop spreading your perverted and sick ideas!

Come, Kabuto, Sasuke-kun, Sound Five, Team Hebi and nameless Oto-Nins, it's time to go home!"

Once again, suddenly Megaphone. Kills. You. appears next to the show's guest and yells "Hey, wait, it's not over yet! This was my first show; I gotta take a picture of my guests and me!"

Orochimaru rolls his eyes, but stays where he is as Karin and Sakura walk up to him and stand next to him and the blonde. An assistant runs onto the stage and pulls out a camera.

"Come on, everybody, say 'Cheese'!"

The camera flashes, then the people on the stage quickly step away from each other. The blond girl shakes Karin's hand first. "Thank you once again, Karin, for being here tonight! I really appreciate it; you've been a great guest!"

The audience applauds as Karin flashes a big grin and waves, before she leaves the stage.

Next come Sakura, and, surprisingly, Ino.

"Woah, wait, Ino, how did you come here so fast?" questions the host as she shakes both females' hands, but the fellow blond just smirks. "Well, anyways, thank you both for coming and for being my guests tonight!" Another loud round of applaud goes through the crowd of people. Both Sakura and Ino bow and wave to them as they leave the building.

"And finally, our last guest, Orochimaru! Really, I feel very honored and flattered to have a ninja like you in our show!" declares the short girl. "To make things clear; I only came here to make the rumors stop."

"Thank you anyways!" The audience stays quite for a while, until Orochimaru glares at them and the snake from earlier hisses angry.

When every guest was gone, the show's host, Megaphone. Kills. You. faces her audience.

"Dear, readers, this was the first episode of "Ranting-Time"! Good night to you all and stay tuned!"

And with that, everybody leaves the room and the curtain falls.

* * *

**This was the first episode of Ranting-Time! Hope you liked it :D Don't worry, it's not over!**

**I want to thank those who reviewed the first two chapters and the ones who favorited this story or alerted it! You guys are great!**

**And really, poor Orochimaru. He just has to have long hair, creepy hair and say "I want Sasuke's body" (with a different meaning of course, get your mind out of the gutter!) and BAM! We call him a pedophile.**

**(Oh, and btw, every episode, or "Show", will feature three to four characters.)**


	4. We're Uchihas and we don't mistreat kids

**This is, needless to say (but I do it anyway!...that ryhmed!), the fourth chapter and thus the fourth rant!**

**This time it's Fugaku and Mikoto, and I want to thank **Ichigoiszero0** for suggesting them! :D**

**This 'episode' is an Uchiha-epsiode xD Sort of. You'll know which Uchiha is the next one...**

**Don't forget to suggest other characters who get bashed (possibly with the reason WHY they get bashed) wrongly!**

* * *

About three weeks (or more) later, it is time for the next show to begin. People arrive in the same room as last time and take a seat as they wait for the show to begin-and to find out who the next (unfortunate) victim/guest is.

Some guys sell popcorn and soda during that time.

Finally, the show's host climbs (with the help of her co-workers) onto the stage. The popcorn-and-soda guys disappear quickly, while the girl fixes her hair and cloths. Then, after she finished, she takes the microphone, clears her throat and greets her audience.

"Welcome back to 'Ranting-Time: When characters fight back!', and yes, I made a longer title. Anyway! My name is Megaphone. Kills. You. and I'm sorry guys for the rather long wait, but I am sure we'll have some interesting guests tonight!" she makes a small, dramatic pause, then continues "As a reminder: Our last guests were Karin, Sakura Haruno, Ino Yamanaka and Orochimaru!

Before we start our today's show, I have something to announce..."

Megaphone. Kills. You. takes out a little piece of paper from a pocket of her skirt and reads out loud "Before we can present our first guests, we have to ask...Sasuke and Itachi Uchiha..."

The blonde looks up and quickly searches for the faces of the two in the crowd, then continues "...to leave the room until they're called back. During that time, they're not allowed to kill each other or to fight. If any of the furniture is destroyed you'll be charged for vandalism."

"Hey! That's unfair!" one of the two complains, but leaves anyway together with his brother.

After the door is closed, the host sighs relieved and exclaims a little quieter than usual "Please welcome with me, Fugaku and Mikoto Uchiha!"

The other two Uchihas step onto the stage and Mikoto waves to the crowd, which is dumbfounded. Some gasp in surprise, while some others faint or shout "How's that _possible_?"

To their disappointment, their question is not answered by Megaphone. Kills. You. who is busy with ignoring them. "So, you know what you have to do?" she asks Fugaku, who simply nods. "Okay, then it's time for you and your wife to start your rant! Have fun and good luck!" says the host.

The audience today was smart enough to bring respirators to protect their lungs from the cloud of smoke in which the blond girl, once again, disappears. Then they focus their attention on the pair on the stage.

"I first want to tell you that I am not going to tell you how we managed to come back from the dead."

An 'Awww..." goes through the audience.

"Hey, you didn't ask Kimimaro, Orochimaru or Itachi, did you?" Mikoto counters. Everyone in the room falls quiet, and so Fugaku can begin.

"With that said, we can come to the task at hand.

It has come to me that my wife and I get 'bashed' in some of your fanfictions and we cannot tolerate that.

The main reason why I get 'bashed' is because you say that I was too focused on Itachi and that I neglected Sasuke that everything was my fault in the first place. Whatever that's supposed to mean."

The shinobi crosses his arms over his chest and clears his throat. "Well, I assume that most of you, but apparently not ALL of you, know that I am the head of the Uchiha _**Clan**_. As that, I have a lot of _responsibility_ and have to care _for the family's well being_.

Itachi was a genius and very gifted, even for an Uchiha and about six years older than his brother, which meant that he was more useful and he was a spy for us which was very important for the family. So it's only normal that I gave him more attention than Sasuke who had barely entered the academy at that time, isn't it? Remember, I am the leader of the family. And it's not like I ignored him; as Mikoto once mentioned, I did talk about him quite a lot when my wife and I were alone.

Another reason why Itachi got more attention is that I knew that Sasuke worshipped him almost like a god when they were little and I wanted to use that for his and the clan's advantage.

I wanted to see Sasuke's full potential, so I told him to be like Itachi. That way, I figured, he would try harder than if I had simply ignored him or just said something else. The 'neglecting' part was for the same reason: If Itachi got my attention, Sasuke would want it too and would work hard for it. After all, I had to make sure that he would turn into a powerful shinobi. Once again, for the clan's sake.

It was all about the clan from the beginning. As the leader of a whole clan, decisions have to be made, and that was one of them. If it benefits the clan, it has to be made anyway, even when the person it's about doesn't get a say in it. You understand? You can't just blame everything on me, just to have somebody to shun for what happened. If you really want to blame somebody, you have to blame every member of the clan, not just me. And yes, that **includes** Itachi and Sasuke."

Fugaku glares at the audience, before he steps back and hands his wife Mikoto the micro.

She brushes a few strands of raven-black hair out of her face, before she starts her own rant.

"It's not just my husband who gets bashed, but also me. And I have to admit that I can't see why! What have I ever done to make you hate me?" She scowls.

"Is it that I didn't interfere when Fugaku over here 'mistreated' (as you put it sometimes) Sasuke? As already mentioned, it wasn't MY decision and it wouldn't have made a difference if I had. I couldn't go against the whole family!

Apart from that, I always cared for both of my sons, and I cared for them equally. I was a faithful wife and a loving mother and still you find reasons to bash me! That's just not fair! Oh, and just because Fugaku doesn't really shows it, doesn't mean that he hates Itachi or Sasuke!"

Guilt shows in the eyes of a few people, others lower their heads at that. Mikoto goes to stand next to Fugaku who is still sending the one or another glare at the audience.

Megaphone. Kills. You. reappears, this time from behind the curtain and thanks the woman quietly as she gives the microphone back to her.

"And this, my dear readers, were Mikoto and Fugaku Uchiha! Thank you two for...coming back from the dead and for being here tonight? If you would please go in the for you prepared room...?"

The pair leaves the stage. Mikoto smiles and waves at the people, while her husband doesn't spare a second glance at them.

After they're gone, two co-workers of the show's host go outside and enter the room again, this time in company of Sasuke and Itachi who were happily chatting and getting along just fine.

"Now, it's time for our next guest!" reminds the blonde with the micro.

The two Uchihas stop their conversation at that and return to their original seats. Megaphone. Kills. You. then announces the next victim/guest.

"He came here and even postponed his attack on Konoha! You don't even have to sit down, Sasuke! It's already your turn!"

* * *

**I can understand when people don't like (I mean, dislike, NOT bash) Fugaku, hell, I disliked him too! But really, _WHAT THE HELL_ has Mikoto done? And I HAVE seen Mikoto-bashing. Don't try to deny the fact that it exists!**


	5. I'm Sasuke and I'm not an emo!

Sasuke Uchiha steps on the stage and the room is filled with both cheers and jeers. It takes the audience a while to quiet down, then Sasuke already takes the microphone and instead of disappearing 'as usual', Megaphone. Kills. You. leaves the normal way. Relieve shows on the faces of some people.

The Uchiha clears his throat before he starts "As I heard, characters of the show Naruto—" Before he can finish his sentence, some people shout "Oh my god! Sasuke Uchiha just TALKED! A miracle! THE Sasuke Uchiha!" Said man's eyes narrow dangerously.

"In fact, I can. As I was saying. I heard that other characters went here before to get rid of certain clichés and haters and I decided to follow their examples.

The first cliché would be that I can't talk and only communicate with several grunts. Which is obviously not true. Actions do speak louder than words, but I am perfectly capable of talking as shown often enough in the story. For example after my fight against Deidara, when I explained how I was able to beat him, shortly before he committed suicide.

Which brings me to another point. Apparently, the fight against him caused quite some people to dislike or even hate me, which I don't understand. Deidara was the one to attack first and I merely defended myself, with the possible prospect of information about Itachi as a bonus. I wonder what you would do if attacked out of nowhere by some guy who is part of the criminal organization your despised brother is a member of and throws insults at you. And as I mentioned, Deidara killed himself by choice. I didn't kill him, he started the fight, he blew himself up and he seemed like he was quite eager to do so. So his death is not my fault."

He makes a pause to let the people think about this. A handful of guests still seem unconvinced, but Sasuke ignores them, having already voiced his opinion.

"Also, people apparently hate me because of my seeking for revenge which caused Itachi's death. Itachi wanted me to kill him. He practically had my whole future planned out and his plan involved me killing him. Even if I hadn't ended his life, the disease that plagued him and also, if you could say so, helped me defeat Itachi would've led to his demise. He implanted the hate inside of me and thus the carving for revenge.

Now you say I am just a...'Emo' and that I'm a 'shitty' character, running around and bitching and crying over my brother and am way too emo. So...you hate me because I was traumatized at young age? Honestly, I am pretty sure that there are people out there who brushed the Uchiha Massacre off as nothing or at least say something like 'Okay, your whole family was slaughtered and you had to witness this twice in Itachi's Tsukuyomi, that's pretty bad and stuff but that doesn't mean you have to be so damn emo. It can't be THAT bad, so be a man and suck it up.'."

"Go, emo-prince!" yells someone, yet Sasuke keeps his cool.

"It seems like you don't understand how much of an effect that can have on the psyche of a seven-year-old. 'Oh, there is blood everywhere, everyone is dead, and I will probably get killed soon too!' Yeah, because that is nothing too bad. Not to mention that the person I admired and loved my whole life murdered our whole family and then makes me relive it. And mocked me by saying that I wasn't even worth to be killed. Betrayal is also not exactly good for the psyche.

Then, how would you react to find out that over half of your life was one big lie? One big act?"

Another silence fills the room and a slight smirk tugs at the shinobi's lips. "That's what I thought" he says. "It is sometimes really entertaining how much you bitch about me bitching, though. And I am not emo. I don't cry and I am an Uchiha, and we're all able to control or at least conceal our emotions very good and I am not having suicidal thoughts and I don't cut myself, because that seems to be your image of an Emo."

Then he clears his throat and states "I usually don't trust rumors, but this one has caught my attention since it is about me. Rumor has it that the way I am sometimes portrayed in some fanfictions is quite different from my actual personality or even looks. First of all, my hair does not look like some poultry's behind. It is spiky, yes, but it definitely does not look like a 'duck-butt' or whatever animal with feathers' behind.

It also seems like some people write that I'm a playboy or at least describe my behavior to be playboy-like. And that I smirk a lot. I don't know if you don't want to accept the truth or if you are simply too dumb to, b

He lets his eyes wander over the audience. Some avoid his gaze, some fangirls squeal and the rest stays silent.

Eventually, Sasuke nods to himself and crosses his arms in front of his chest. "I wonder why I even bother to respond to your immature provoking and hating. All my actions were reasonable from my point of view and current condition of my psyche."

The show's host reappears, once again not in a cloud of smoke and she takes the microphone from him. "Aaaand that was Sasuke Uchiha for you! Sasuke, if you may follow my co-worker?" A man with a T-shirt which has 'STAFF' written across it gestures the ninja to follow him, which said Uchiha does.

After the two disappeared from the stage, the blond female grins and happily announces "Our show will become a little artistic now!

Because our next guest is a true artist...and his art is a bang! Please welcome with me, Deidara from the Akatsuki!"

* * *

**Late update? Yeah. I am sorry guys, but I had a bit of a writer's block and when I finally had enough reasons together, they wouldn't let me update. **Ichigoiszero0**suggested Kushina and Minato, so they'll probably come after Deidara, I need to research a little bit... Don't worry, I won't take that much time to update again! (...I hope.)** **And thank you very much for your kind reviews :3**


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